Magic 8 Ball - Colts vs. Jets 2011 Wild Card Playoffs Predictions

In two days, Peyton Manning and the royal blue Colts will take on the gan-green Jets at home in Lucas Oil Stadium to see which team gets to extend its Super Bowl run.

I don't have the analytical football skills to offer insightful breakdowns or appropriate predictions, so I will leave that to the people who actually know what they are talking about. What I do have, however, is my trusty magic 8 ball. I thought it did a pretty good job on the Colts vs. Titans game last week, but we'll see what else it has in store for us.

Today, it will tell us whether it's time to dream big or dream on:
  1. Dallas Clark and Austin Collie have left Hagrid-sized shoes for other Colts to fill. Are Jacob Tamme and Blair White going to be up for the job? - Better not tell you now.
  2. Are we going to see another reincarnation of Pierre Garcon as a drop-a-saurus? - Reply hazy, try again. Tried again and it said, Cannot predict now. Doh.
  3. Is Reggie Wayne going to take a vacation on Revis Island? - Very doubtful.
  4. Will the Colts' special teams have a spectacularly, as in spectacularly good, special night? - YES.
  5. Will Mark Sanchez help the Colts beat the Jets? - It is decidedly so.
  6. Will Peyton Manning carve up the Jets' defense like last year's Thanksgiving turkey? - My reply is no.
  7. Is Rex Ryan going to put his wife's foot in his mouth? - It is decidedly so.
  8. Will the Colts win against the Jets this Saturday? - Most likely.
Okay, so not a definitive Colts' blowout win prediction like I wanted, but I'll take it because it seems to side more with our men in blue. I really hope it's wrong about Garcon dropping passes though. And regarding the blip about Manning and the Jets' defense, I will take that to mean that he will carve up the Jets' defense, but just not as much as he did last year.

By the way, I'm really liking that the liquid inside my magic 8 ball is blue. However, I wish it could answer things other than yes or no questions. Then I could ask it something like, "How many peeps can Rex Ryan sandwich in between his cheeks?"

I bet it's not 18.

Go Colts!


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